Jonah Eleison Procuniar

I think my life has been defined by heaviness as of lately. First with the passing of my grandmother and now with the news of Jonah's Tumor. I did not find myself extremely emotional during my time in Iowa with family during my grandmother's services, not for a lack of sadness but I think I was choosing to suppress all the emotions and just enjoy my family during that time. I remember being proud of myself for keeping my emotions in check, as I am usually extremely emotional! I came home from Iowa a dove right into three long days at work! This also kept me busy allowing me to not think about my emotions! Friday I found out that Jonah had a cancerous tumor in his kidney. This hit me like a ton of bricks! I think all the emotions and heaviness that I hadn't been feeling all came streaming out and just knocked me over.

I had the privileged of watching Jonah every day for almost 3 years! He, Molly and Ben really just became an extension of mine and Nate's family. We love them like they are part of our family! We have loved over the past few years getting to watch Jonah grow up and learn! I often miss that time of life just hanging out with Jonah on a daily basis! It really made life so much fun!! About two years in Molly decided to stay home so I got to hang out with Molly and Jonah on a regular basis and I loved it!! We have so missed regularly having them in our life since our move!! We are always thankful for any trips back to Ohio when we get to spend time with them!! God has definitely used them to bless and bring much joy to our lives!

I have been trying to keep myself busy the last few days because whenever I think about little Jonah and all the tough things that are ahead for him I get so sad! I have been looking at many pictures from over the years and video's that make me laugh and smile! I so wish that I could be home to just sit and spend time with Molly, Ben and Jonah! God knows all and his timing is perfect so I have to trust that He knows all that Molly and Ben are going through and He knows exactly what encouragement they need and when. I am so thankful for my mom who has been able to spend lots of time with them! She has sent Nate and I many pictures and video's of Jonah! We love seeing his smiling face!! We got to talk to Jonah on Friday night, his first night at Children's, and it was wonderful! We will be calling him more over the next few weeks and I am so thankful for technology that allows us to do that!

Tomorrow Jonah has his surgery at  11:45!  I so wish I could be there to sit with Molly and Ben as they wait for Jonah to come out! Nate and I will be praying and fasting all day! We will be praying specifically for the hands of the surgeons that they will be steady and strong! We are praying that God will give Jonah peace in his little heart as he will be experiencing  some scary things tomorrow.  We will also be praying specifically for Molly and Ben as they wait, wait, wait tomorrow. We are praying that they will feel peace that only God can give!!

We love our little Jonah and we trust  Gods sovereignty over his life even in these scary time of uncertainty!

Psalms 46:1 "God is my Refuge and Strength a very present help in trouble"

Sara Groves "It's Going to be Alright"
http://youtu.be/E9yNZ17j8Fg

It's going to be alright
It's going to be alright

I can tell by your eyes that you're not getting any sleep
And you try to rise above it, but feel you're sinking in too deep
Oh, oh I believe, I believe that

It's going to be alright
It's going to be alright

I believe you'll outlive this pain in you heart
And you'll gain such a strength from what is tearing you apart
Oh, oh I believe I believe that

It's going to be alright
It's going to be alright

When some time has past us, and the story if retold
It will mirror the strength and the courage in your soul
Oh, oh, I believe I believe,

I believe
I believe

I did not come here to offer you clich?'s
I will not pretend to know of all your pain
Just when you cannot, then I will hold out faith, for you

It's going to be alright
It's going to be alright